Wabash Swimming and Diving Pre-Season (By Spolaria ’08)

1. Time to pay up – Freshmen: we’ve all invested a lot of time and energy into being nice to you for during the recruiting process. Your turn to pay us back. We do not haze here, but you will be asked to carry bags and other light work. Don’t be mad about this. Earn your stripes; the upperclassmen already had to earn theirs. So pay up both in and out of the pool.

2. Mr. Nice Guy – Get as much “nice” time out of coach as possible. This is the point in theseason where he’s most relaxed. The freshmen have infinite potential, and the Red Sox are not statistically eliminated from playoff contention (yet). Seriously, around conference time any loud noises freak out coach so bad that a mere “Hello” could turn into a 1000 fly (Not really, but he does freak out).

3. 6 AM in college is not 6 AM in high school – I came from a high school where morning practices started at 4:45. 6 at Wabash equals 3 in the real world. When you are up all night reading books, writing papers, or spending the evening playing XBox, 6 AM can be a time you really do not want to know exists.

4. Literacy is cool – Learn to read practices. Coach has an insane way of writing practices, so spend the preseason learning how to decipher his East Coast gibberish. Guys in your lane will kill you by January if everyday you ask what 8 x 100 Fr SD 1-4 Red to Orange means.

5. I want to ride my bicycle – The triathlon is not fun. In fact, it sucks unless you’re a masochist like Manker, Ben Hewitt, or Kasey. Train for it, or it will hurt…bad.

5b. – Swimming Ranger Day is returning again as an excuse to watch people hurt themselves off the high dive, run obstacle courses, and flip canoes. A word of advice from someone who has taken an involuntary swim in the lake: bring a change of clothes

6. Training for the Tigers – No joke here; this is dead serious. We have not beat DePauw in a duel meet in four years. If you haven’t yet noticed, the duel meet has been moved from January to November. So let’s keep the bell one week and send DePauw away from our pool with a loss a few weeks later.

7. Little kids pay for trips to Florida – Some of us enjoy giving lessons, some despise it, but all know they will do it. Freshmen: expect to have two lessons. Seniors get first call of having only one lesson. Remember: these lessons keep coach funded enough so we can spend more money on a breakfast bill then the hotel bill. Conveniently enough, the surgeon has forbidden me from being in the water.

8. I pledge allegiance – Declare your sports affiliations early and often. The one thing this team loves to talk about besides swimming (and making fun of each other) is sports.

9. Prioritize – How Wabash works: 1. School 2. Swimming 3. Living Unit. Don’t like it? Too bad. There are no freebees for athletes here. This is an academic institution. We are serious about our sports, but education is why we are here.

10. Don’t bring the weak…stuff – This team fights back through adversity. Problems come, and problems go, but we work hard day in and day out no matter what situation comes our way.